A Visual of My Life

I have always said that my home, is a direct reflection of my mental status. Well, I have become a strict, disciplined, homemaker. Lol. Hilarious, but true. My home is usually always organized, but every once-in-a-while, things get CRAY! This has changed since married life. I have had to be more organized and disciplined since we moved into our new home and it has helped to keep my home organized most of the time.

I have FINALLY mastered this so, I have to wait a while before I can add a baby to this madness. (For those who want to know when we are having children. *wink*)


Anyways... This mess has now infiltrated it's way into my technology home. This is a screenshot of my desktop.

This only shows half of the picture. You can't see the emails that I've flagged, the 7 to-do lists I have created and all of the things that I have saved in delicious to read later. I say all of this to say...

I need an assistant. I can pay in therapy (this is a joke for my counselor friends and the counseling board). I can also pay in filtered water, organizational tips, and hugs. This is the best time to get in because when I  make it... So will you.

Ok. Now I must get back to work...

My So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife

Although I have completed a doctoral degree, I often find myself wondering if I should have gotten a Ph.D. in marriage. Seriously. I love being married and I love my husband even more than that, but I find myself learning more and more about how to be a good Christian wife everyday.

I really enjoy reading and I have made it a point to vary the types of books I read (regular fiction, academic, research related, Christian fiction, marriage, and so on). I just finished reading a book titled, "My So-Called Life as a Proverbs 31 Wife" and I would recommend it to any married woman or woman considering marriage. When I read the description of the Proverbs 31 wife, I felt annoyed (I mean, who can really do all of that?) and unworthy (All of that seems overwhelming so, I am not cut out to be a Christian wife). However, the author, Sara Horn, uses this book to share her own obstacles, frustrations, and successes of her one year experiment to become a Proverbs 31 wife. Her story is reflective, inspirational, motivational, and funny. If nothing else, I found myself feeling a little better  about my "wife abilities" when I read about some of her mishaps during the journey. She even ends the book with a 10-day experiment for you to try and several easy recipes to make for your family.

As women, I know we often struggle with the Work/Life balance. I work from home a lot of the times and I could easily work all day and all night. I enjoy my career and I value the work that I do, but I know that I don't do a great job of balancing work with the other things that are important. This book is a fun read, but also helped me to reflect on different aspects of my life. If you are interested click here to read a sample chapter. I would love to know what you think about the Proverbs 31 wife or the book that can be found here.

Thanks for reading and please share your thoughts.

New Year, New Changes, New Goals!

We have rang in the New Year, made our resolutions, and said goodbye to the holiday season. Unfortunately, some of us have already given up on your New Year's resolutions. While I try to spend more time focusing on my daily resolutions, I also realize the benefits of using the new year as a way to re-evaluate, re-focus, and re-set. There is something about the beginning of a new year that causes us all to look back at the past year and visualize our hopes for the upcoming year.

I have two main resolutions for this year...

1. Develop a 30 before 30 list by June of this year and start working on this.
2. Maintain more balance in my life.

Plans for keeping our resolutions typically start off strong, but often"fizzle out" long before our goals are reached. Once we get wrapped up in our busy lives and schedules, the hope of keeping our resolutions begins to decrease and most of us will give up long before we begin to think about our resolutions for 2013. So... How can we make sure that we do something different this year? While I don't have all the answers, here are some suggestions that can help you stay on track this year.

Create goals that are SMART

1. Specific- Be very specific about what you want to accomplish. So instead of maintaing a more balanced life. I will evaluate my life and write down the specific thing I need to do to make sure my life is balanced.
2. Measurable- I always ask how will I know (using my five senses that I reached my goal). Using my balance example... I will know when I have reached my goal when I am spending two hours a day everyday during the week dedicated to my family and when I am only spending one day of the weekend doing work.
3. Attainable- While I am all about setting high goals for yourself, make sure you set goals that have a realistic plan to get you where you want to go. For example, I gave myself for six months to develop a 30 before 30 list. I think this is very realistic and it gives me time to develop a list that is meaningful and that I will actually stick to.
4. Relevant- If it is not relevant, you won't make it past week 1.
5. Time Bound- How long do you want to work on this goal?

Happy New Year! 

I am Thankful

This week has been a rough week. All week my husband and I have been dealing with unexpected challenges in addition to the everyday stressors that come with our lives. I thought my husband and I were handling it fairly well. We would consult about the unexpected challenges, create an action plan, and execute it. , We even talked about still being blessed in spite of these challenges. However, I was still harboring resentment towards the source of these challenges. I was focusing on being resentful and tallying the issues we were facing in my mind. 

This morning around 4:30, I had a strong urge that I needed to get up and work. I often get up to write or work on an article so, this wasn't too "out of the norm." Before starting to write, I read a devotional message. The reflection component of the Encouragement for Today stated, "Even in the midst of things stolen, I have been given the great gift of remembering all I still have." The author talked about having an experience where she realized that someone had stole several of her things that held special memories in her heart. Instead of reacting she sat down and wrote a list of things she was thankful for and prayed for whoever had stolen from her. She used the verse, Psalm 107:1 “Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever.” (NIV). Wow!!!! Sometimes God just amazes me by how intentional and wonderful he is. So, I began to write a list of things I am thankful for. 

• I am thankful for my marriage. I am thankful for the closeness, chemistry and friendship we share. I am thankful that I have someone to share the highs and lows with.
• I am thankful for the health of my family members and the great experiences they are all facing. 
• I am thankful every day for my mind. As a counselor, I am so aware of how easy it is to struggle emotionally and mentally and I am thankful that my mind works the way it does. 
• I am thankful to have a job that I love for so many reasons. 
• I am thankful that God put it on my mind to work this morning instead of what he really wanted me to focus on (Being Thankful instead of Resentful) because I am not sure I would have gotten out of bed.

And my list goes on... I also said a prayer for the individuals that were responsible for much of the stress we experienced. I feel more centered, more grounded, more focused, more balanced.  For that I am grateful. 

To read the actual article, click here. 

Lessons from Dr. Hale

Dr. Frank W. Hale Jr. passed away recently and I attended his funeral on this past Sunday. The ceremony was amazing and I got the chance to learn so much more about him that I did not know. I am so blessed to have had the chance to have him as a mentor. Here are a few lessons I learned from "Doc" that I will take with me forever. 

• If you walk with God, he will walk with you EVERYWHERE.
• Don't just dream. Start doing so that you can live the dream.
• Always write down your thoughts. Eventually you can compile them to share with others.
• Dream Big. Why not be a college president?
• You are unique and you have things that others don't have. So, never count yourself out.
• It is not okay to except unfair or discriminatory treatment.
• Stand up for those who may not have a voice.
• Focus on service and all the things that are important will come just in time.
• God loves you. Spread that love.

These are just a few things that I learned from Dr. Hale. I hope to pass these lessons on as he did. To read more about my experience with Dr. Hale, click here.

Do You Want to Know What the PhD Process is Like?

While going through the PhD process, I often had people ask me what it was like and what I was doing. So, I decided to blog through part of the process. You can learn more about the process at The Pursuit of a PhD. I will also add tips about the PhD process and any information that I think of that may be useful to those pursuing a PhD. I hope you enjoy this blog, as well. And I hope that some of you decide to.... pursue a PhD.

PhD in Hand! Now What?

I have dreamed of owning a PhD from as early as I can remember. At the age of 26, all of that hard work finally paid off and I earned my degree. My graduation from The Ohio State University, was very special to me and I have never felt so proud. So many people that I didn't even know reached out to me to show their love and appreciation. I must admit it was overwhelming. Now that graduation is over and I am now carrying those three letters behind my name, what does it mean? What will I do with it? Will I allow it to mean anything? Well... We Shall See. I invite you to follow me on my journey of exploring this my new life with a PhD.